Perspective...

Hi, it's Geri, I can't remember where I first found this, but wanted to share.It seems 45 is big for a lot of women. My "45 New Things" stemmed from the desire to celebrate my 45th year. When  Regina Brett, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio turned 45 years old, ... She wrote this list...

(My comments will be in blue cause it is my favorite color).

"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most-requested column I've ever written, so here is the column once more:

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
Fair just seems relative... some folks are asked to handle more. And I think life is good most of the time, and truely great for moments... it is these moments we will remember.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
This year I am jumping in with both feet- I keep asking myself...What do you have to lose?

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
True... Always... but hard, some days are really, really hard...

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
I cherish my family and my friends who are family... but need to write and  tell them so.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
Working on it... but not there yet...

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
You need to accept that some folks are not capable of hearing your opinion if it doesn't agree with their own...

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
This is what the girlfriends are for... Thankfully I have a big bunch of amazing wwomen to lean on.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
But don't walk away. Or stay away. Cause He really loves you.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
I wish I had... And I am sure I am not alone.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
But try... Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels...

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
Moving on... easy to say and incredibly hard to do. Refer back to #2

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
And they have... Tears of joy, of sorrow. Life is real.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
Everyone has stuff going on, some are just better at keeping it quiet. Coping alone. Grieving in silence.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
I wish I didn't know this from personal experience.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
Change can be subtle, but it can also be shockingly sudden. Hold on to your faith, whichever it is, and the people you love. Even the worst storm passes...eventually.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
It can also keep you from saying something you can never take back.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

Clutter... My neverending battle...

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

This is especially true of teenagers... The teen years don't last forever, even when it feels like they will never end.

19. It is never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

My happy childhood took place during my college years- a good time had by all. I cherish the memories.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
I have to disagree or amend this one... Don't take no for an answer if Yes is truely an option... And you have to know when it isn't an option.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, and wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
Mom died with some gifts still in their gift boxes. It made me sad to think she saved stuff for a time that didn't come.

22. Over prepare, and then go with the flow.

Things will go wrong with the best laid plans. And sometimes those are the best memories. Like camping out in April and having it snow...

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
Way ahead on this one. I am me, for better or worst.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
And the heart runs a close second.

25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
Step away from those who routinely cause you pain. Get closer to those who build you up and bring you joy.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'
Very little does...

27. Always choose life.
Death is forever, and your family and friends will miss you even if they are mad or disappointed with you in this moment.

28. Forgive everyone everything.
Harder to do than say...but much more important for you than them.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
Loads of folks will base their opinion on a moment or a word. Be true to you.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time the time it needs.
This is a really hard thing... I need daily reminders that the path can be curved and double back, even as I am moving forward.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
Like death and taxes, change is inevitable.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
Laugh at youself when you are being ridiculous. It is good for the soul.

33. Believe in miracles.
They happen every day. I've seen them.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
I believe He is a lot more flexible than most people I know but that He expects us to live a good life and serve as a benefit to the world...

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
With only one shot, you want to participate. I for one don't want to regret not trying something, not going somewhere... so dance like nobody is watching, even when they are.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
Dying young is a tragedy for those left behind.

37. Your children get only one childhood.
Try not to screw it up...

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
Being remembered as a good person is essential to that, I think...

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
And walking to and from your front door and car door DOES NOT COUNT!!!

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
Most days, mostly true.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
Clutter clutter... way more than we need...

42. The best is yet to come.
Really totally hoping this is true. If it isn't I AM DISAPPOINTED!!!

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
Be a person who honors their word, does what they say they will...

44. Yield.
Seriously... in life and when driving, sometimes you just need to be the bigger person...

45. “Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift."

Hi again! I just wanted to let you all know that some reports have Regina as 90 when she wrote this list- the stuff of urban legend, I assure you. Thanks Regina for this wonderful food for thought. I will be looking for your books...